Party Boy Loves Party Music

Every party has a Party Boy, and every Party Boy is my nemesis. See, I understand the importance of a rad playlist to keep the energy up. Lame music = lame party. But, what I don’t need is Muammar Gaddafi spinning the soundtrack. Autocracy is for the middle east, not my stereo. PB doesn’t get this and even though he isn’t hosting, he will be DJing. No matter if some bad bitch is getting her eagle on all over the kitchen table, nor the dance floor repeatedly smashing their genitalia together in a precoital rhythm, PB wants to drunkenly belt out the lyrics to “don’t stop believing” and it will be so.

Invariably Party Boy sees the demise of the party and will quickly react to save this catastrophe.

“Hey Bro, you got an Ipod”
“uh yeah”
“Is it any good?”

You want to know my opinion of the music on my own Ipod? Thats like asking me if I’m any good at jerking off.

“fuck yeah bro, I come every time!”

I know what your going to do Party Boy, you’re going to kill the track mid chorus, fumble around for half a minute while everyone looks confused, then promptly blast a Miley record. It’s highly unBro like.

Not becoming a Party Boy is all about following some simple etiquette. Not your party? Don’t fuck with the stereo. Want to hear something else? Feel free to make a suggestion. Someone telling you to fuck off? Promptly fuck off.


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